Waking up from the stress bubble - Article 1 of 3 on the topic Health-promoting benefits for leaders
We are more enlightened and have more information than ever before, yet there are so many who feel emptiness on the inside, a lack of happiness and meaning. As the psychologist Fredrik Bengtsson describes it, despite the advancement of technology and the comforts of today and life, we suffer from spiritual distress. Many tamps with time and a spinning wheel of life to try to make everyday life go together. What exactly is the purpose of life? How do you want life to feel? Do the answers to these questions agree with the life you live or do you need to wake up? Or is it that you are awake but still close your eyes?
Since 2010, sick leave with fatigue symptoms has increased sixfold.
We have normalized a completely unnatural behavior to be constantly on G, connected, busy. Many people I meet in coaching or in everyday conversations say that they can not sit still before the restlessness is a fact or that they are not the type who are still and like to have things going on all the time and they actually think it's fun. I was 18 years ago, I was an elite athlete, a trainer at an elite level and had two companies, both of which in the health industry, thus fairly aware of the subject. Performing, being active and doing fun things is good as long as we have an opposite pole of calm and rest, then we can create balance, we need it. At a hospital focused on stress-related mental illness (for care and hospital staff) in Stockholm County Council, a survey in 2016 showed a sharp increase in the number of doctors who were on sick leave for fatigue depression. Even if we have knowledge, it is not easy to be aware of ourselves in the midst of life's hurricane. When we are there (trapped in the winds of unconsciousness) we think we know ourselves and we think we know what is good for us, I thought so too, I also thought .. that it would never happen to me.
However, I think most of us know that we feel good about stressing less, eating better, exercising and being present. It's about waking up, to stop closing our eyes even though we can see, to stop being in denial, to stop being a victim of circumstances, it's to take responsibility for oneself, one's life and one's work situation. It's that simple even though it's not always that easy. Why do not we do that then? It is everyone's opportunity to create a life-giving life with good relationships and valuable content without stress. There are those who live like this both in their free time and in the workplace.
How do you as a leader choose to take responsibility for your well-being, how are you a role model? How do you meet your employees and what culture are you involved in and contribute to in the workplace?
Are we motivated to soul change, can we be when we do not really know how it feels to feel really good, to be happy, to have full balance, to have loving relationships, and to be true to ourselves? Can we do it when we have normalized and think that this is how it is? Everyone who reads this article will probably have a different picture of what balance is, what loving relationships are and what it means to be true to oneself. The important thing in the question is who you want to be and how you want to live and work.
Most people I talk to experience something that then leads to change whether it is about smoking, leaving an unfavorable relationship, stress or something else. It can be an event, a conversation, a song, a text, an insight, an experience, something that creates a feeling on the inside that arouses the desire to take action, then the journey to something new begins.
Self-leadership is here and now, not tomorrow. It does not get any easier to postpone things and it is never too late. In connection with stress, self-leadership must be put to the test, for some it does not require much while for others it is extremely challenging, to prioritize, to set boundaries, to say no, to be true to oneself. That we tackle it so differently can be due to several factors, heritage, environment and our unique Self, what we reflected in when we grew up such as family, society, education system, but also our own experiences, increased behavioral patterns and our unique personality.
I want to go back to my own situation about 18 years ago, to perform and have a lot of balls in the air. That in itself was not really the problem itself. As I see it, it is more about the attitude to the life situation and above all the attitude or relationship to oneself. I was a good girl with unfavorable strategies who unknowingly sought confirmation of achievement and results. At that time, I was unaware of and without the competence or support to step into my self-leadership. Behind the search for confirmation of achievement and results are universal natural needs, such as being accepted, feeling liked, belonging, participating, contributing, making a difference or just being seen, heard or loved. Here I think we are starting to sniff at what is the cause of stress rather than the symptoms we are constantly trying to deal with with not so lasting results if we look at our well-being and number of sick leaves today. When you as a leader increase your own awareness of yourself (probably on a deeper level than you think), the ability to see behind the facade grows in others as well, then you can also reach out, meet employees' needs, do what you can to increase well-being in the team and together with the employees move towards goals and results.
We are too tired (life spins) or too comfortable (it can be hard) to meet ourselves to take care of the cause and change, so we try as long as possible to deny ourselves and our natural needs (whereupon stress increases). Nonchalantly, we see it as natural that we have a little pain here and there and that we take tablets for pain and that we sleep poorly. We allow the excitement of society and companies and many become unconsciously or consciously active in a culture that promotes ill health. When I worked as a therapist, I met lost young people who (in the absence of meaning, presence or deep emotional contact) engaged in destructive behaviors and I met parents of children who have committed suicide and we constantly see adults creating diseases that literally take our lives. For what? What role models are we for the next generation?
(warning for strong images)
I meet again and again people who have made the "journey of stress" and many wish that they were challenged in their way of thinking and acting, that they received support to meet their real needs behind the symptoms and tools to create a new outlook on life and new behavior. long before stress or ill health was a fact. Of all I have met in conversations, coaching, supervision, education and in retreats over the past 15 years, of those who have chosen to meet themselves, who have had courage in the moment and perseverance in everyday life, who have stepped into their self-leadership, I see gratitude, pride , strength and personal maturity. Every moment during the journey has been worth everything when you experience increased awareness, a sense of security, a sense of freedom and more access to all your inner resources and a whole new ability to maneuver yourself and be a director in your own life.
The wise realize that personal development is a benefit and an investment!
What could be your next step in becoming a director in your own life?
- Anna Ugander
Categories: : English